The Good, the Bad, and the Aunties

1

The wind is a constant song in my ears, the air so cold and refreshing it sparkles against my cheeks as I whoosh down the ski slope. I can't believe this is the first time I've tried skiing. Growing up, Ma and the aunts had forbidden me from doing any "dangerous sports," which included anything more physically strenuous than chess or piano. When I was five, I suggested that I wanted to try out for the girls' soccer team. In response, Ma smacked her palms to her cheeks and wailed, "Aiya, the ball will hit you in the head and you will get brain hemo-hedge!"

"What's a brain hemo-hedge?" Images of a hedge growing out of my head swirled through my mind.

Ma waved her hands around her head, opening and closing her hands. "Is when all the blood come out of your head. All the blood."

My mind replaced the hedge bursting out of my head with buckets of blood exploding from it in a red geyser. I swallowed, feeling ill. "Wait, so this is a thing that happens when people play soccer?"

Ma nodded sagely.

My mouth dropped open in horror. "Jenny plays soccer!" I couldn't believe that Mrs. Andrews would let Jenny play such a dangerous sport.

Ma nodded again, this time somberly. "Ah yes. This because Jenny is middle child. You should be grateful you are only child."

After that day, I hugged Jenny tight whenever I could, because the poor thing had no idea she was (1) this close to having her head explode like a watermelon on the beach, and (2) unloved due to her fraught position in the family as a middle child.

Soccer was the first sport to be deemed too deadly by Ma, but over the next few months, she and the aunties added to the growing list.

Softball: The ball will smash right through your chest and come out the other side!

Basketball: The ball will decopitot you! (Decopitot: verb. To have something hit you in the head so forcefully that your head is replaced by that thing. Highly probable when playing high-velocity, high-strength sports like

Jesse Q. Sutanto is the award-winning, bestselling author of adult, young adult, and children's middle-grade books. She has a master's degree in creative writing from Oxford University, though she hasn't found a way of saying that without sounding obnoxious. Her adult books include Dial A for Aunties, Four Aunties and a Wedding, and Vera Wong's Unsolicited Advice for Murderers. Her young adult books include Well, That Was Unexpected; The Obsession; and The New Girl. Her middle-grade book includes Theo Tan and the Fox Spirit.

"Sutanto packs in loads of local color, and gives the aunties ample opportunity to let their freak flags fly. Publishers Weekly

Sutanto delivers another addictive romp, managing to negotiate a thrilling (multi) happily-everafter finale because, alas, this concludes the Aunties series. Booklist


Sutanto s hilarious triptych ends with a finale that could just as well have been titled An Auntie You Can t Refuse. Kirkus Reviews

"The Good, the Bad, and the Aunties is a fun, fast-paced read and a satisfying conclusion to the popular series." Bookpage

"Jesse Q. Sutanto puts both the action and the comedy in this story at the forefront. One second, you ll be worrying for Meddy s life, and in the next second, you ll be cracking up at a comment one of her aunties made. To put it simply, Jesse Q. Sutanto has a gift." Culturess