The Only Constant
A Guide to Embracing Change and Leading an Authentic Life
(Sprache: Englisch)
You can become the change driver of your own life. The celebrated poet, educator, and author of Welcome Home shows you how in this practical, wise, and tender guide to all of life’s changes.
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You can become the change driver of your own life. The celebrated poet, educator, and author of Welcome Home shows you how in this practical, wise, and tender guide to all of life’s changes.“Change is hard—but Najwa shows you what’s on the other side, and she’s the one you want to lead you through it.”—Melissa Urban, New York Times bestselling author of The Book of Boundaries
In The Only Constant, Najwa Zebian guides you through the changes we must make and those we must endure in life, offering support, stabilizing practices, and step-by-step guidance to make it through the uncertainty. With timeless wisdom, Najwa shares stories of change from her own life, including the bonds to the past she needed to break so that she could live more honestly, the loss of a loved one, and accepting the changes required to manage chronic illness.
She also guides you through changes like:
• The end of a romantic relationship or friendship
• Setting boundaries with a friend or family member
• Changing your educational and career path
• Grieving the death of a loved one
• Breaking trauma bonds
• Venturing outside of your survival mode
• Living an authentic life
• Practicing radical acceptance
A highly practical guide to unfamiliar terrain, The Only Constant teaches that the purpose of change is to be true to yourself. Zebian simplifies change, teaches us to accept ourselves as we are now, and helps us focus on the necessity and unexpected beauty of those messy transitional times. And she guides you through it so that you can not only reach the better life that awaits you on the other side, but also so that you can take the wheel and become the driver of change in your own life.
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Chapter 1Why Change Is Hard
Hint: Because we want it to be easy.
I will never forget the moment everything changed for me. I ve always known that change is hard, whether it s a change I choose, or one life chooses for me. I ve also always known that change is one of life s only constants. Not just that, change is one of life s most beautiful truths. Change is what puts life in our lives. Change is the gateway to authentic transformation.
I don t know about you, but the part I couldn t quite put my finger on for the longest time was this: How on Earth do I actually embrace change instead of just knowing and believing that change is an integral part of life? How do I make change beautiful and necessary, instead of staying stuck at the intersection of knowing and doing? How do I stop trying to skip the part that is messy, uncertain, and unstable? How do I just do change?
How do I go from knowing that I need to live my life authentically to actually living that way? Especially when it means that my life will be flipped upside down in this pursuit? How do I go from knowing that the self-loving thing to do is to leave all toxic relationships behind and believe that I can form healthy connections, to actually doing that? How do I go from knowing that I want a career I love, not what my family or friends think is best for me, to actually pursuing it? How do I go from knowing that boundaries are essential for my self-preservation to not allowing guilt to make me go back on them? How do I go from knowing that grief is healing to actually sitting with it?
There is one thing I know for sure. As Greek philosopher Heraclitus once said, Change is the only constant in life. You can resist the flow of life, but all that does is keep you living in resistance, going against the current of being alive. Embracing the only constant in life eases your transformation into the person you are meant to be the most authentic version of yourself.
Life
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gave me opportunities to try embracing change. And without fail, it will give you opportunities to embrace change. I will tell you my stories in this book, and I hope that they help you feel less alone as you confront your own changes the changes you choose, the ones you don t, and the ones you need to make. But first I want to tell you about a moment that brought it all together for me and taught me five truths about change.
1. Change Is Hard Because We Focus So Much on How Hard Change Is Instead of Seeing It as a Path to the Life We Want
Right before I started writing this book, my grandma passed away peacefully in her sleep. She and my grandpa had been together for seventy-five years.
The day after she died, my mom and I and a few family friends were sitting with my grandpa in his front yard, surrounded by all the beautiful flowers my grandma grew over the years. We sat under the same grapevine where I had spent many childhood hours waiting for its bunches to turn from tiny sour green grapes to big juicy drops from heaven. It was always my grandma who made sure my grandpa picked me the exact one I wanted.
We were all engulfed in the big void of her absence. When you lose someone you love, their absence somehow intensifies how their presence would feel.
It was quiet. We could hear the leaves and the wind make the most peaceful symphony that somehow put us all in a trance of feeling as if my grandma were still there. Then moments would come when we would snap back into reality and tears would just start quietly streaming down our faces. My grandpa s tears carved two streets on his cheeks for his grief to express itself. He had been quietly crying, but this time he said out loud, How am I going to live without you, my best friend? A family friend, who I am sure had the best intention
1. Change Is Hard Because We Focus So Much on How Hard Change Is Instead of Seeing It as a Path to the Life We Want
Right before I started writing this book, my grandma passed away peacefully in her sleep. She and my grandpa had been together for seventy-five years.
The day after she died, my mom and I and a few family friends were sitting with my grandpa in his front yard, surrounded by all the beautiful flowers my grandma grew over the years. We sat under the same grapevine where I had spent many childhood hours waiting for its bunches to turn from tiny sour green grapes to big juicy drops from heaven. It was always my grandma who made sure my grandpa picked me the exact one I wanted.
We were all engulfed in the big void of her absence. When you lose someone you love, their absence somehow intensifies how their presence would feel.
It was quiet. We could hear the leaves and the wind make the most peaceful symphony that somehow put us all in a trance of feeling as if my grandma were still there. Then moments would come when we would snap back into reality and tears would just start quietly streaming down our faces. My grandpa s tears carved two streets on his cheeks for his grief to express itself. He had been quietly crying, but this time he said out loud, How am I going to live without you, my best friend? A family friend, who I am sure had the best intention
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Autoren-Porträt von Najwa Zebian
Najwa Zebian
Bibliographische Angaben
- Autor: Najwa Zebian
- 2024, Internationale Ausgabe, 272 Seiten, Masse: 14,3 x 20,8 cm, Kartoniert (TB), Englisch
- Verlag: Harmony
- ISBN-10: 0593797485
- ISBN-13: 9780593797488
Sprache:
Englisch
Pressezitat
Dr. Najwa Zebian offers profound wisdom and healing insights, encouraging you not only to welcome change but to wholeheartedly embrace it as the path to creating the life you truly desire. With her perceptive guidance, she gently navigates the challenging experiences of loss, transitions, and heartbreak, providing manageable steps that lead you from your current reality to the future you seek. Her clear, tender, and wise advice serves as a beautiful source of encouragement for anyone facing the uncertainties of change, offering a steady hand to guide you through uncertain times. Todd Baratz, LMHC, creator of YourDiagnonsense and author of How to Love Someone Without Losing Your Mind
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